whenever i look at the moon i look at you you know that the story is told it's time to unfold - suddenly it feels too soon your heart feels like an empty room your eyes feel too cold your shoulders too bold and if there's one thing i fear it's you, not being here / as it already seems to be | maybe the two of us need to know how it is to be only one only one time, maybe later we can shine together forever like ben affleck & j-lo | don't believe the face you see my heart is full of empathy same black suit for each day of the week not allowed to speak about times i feel weak you ask for exchange, how about we exchange some insights, about what's inside could be nice (and: that's my price, that's my time rate) | building up my life keeping myself as a mother and a wife marrying a heart of my own because in fact, i do like my soul |
right now, i feel like the conqueror of my own mind. because "self love"? that is truly hard to find. on this journey i explore my own feelings i link them to new meanings like lovely greetings, for example. but i also misread things as i please things that are not-a-deep-thing, they're only fleeting. on this journey i walk, i stumble, i grow, but most importantly i show that i can love me for me and that i love me the most. | stepping away from a situation is not a step back. it's more likely to be a step out of the tunnel, out of the mud, shaking it off from your feet before turning around to see the bigger picture again. | a woman, a wife building a life right in front of you she does everything for you she hasn't thought this through you come and go not letting her know you don't want her to grow so you stop yourself from loving her - "we are not where we were" while she says, "i do not know who you are" | "zuhause" what does it stand for? it can be a world within yourself, torn apart or whole at once. it can be a sudden emotion touching your heart with careful fingers or it can be a recurring warmth, feeling like a warming hug. it can be a memory - so distant, so far - but it can also be an overwhelming "love at first sight" type of a new und unforeseen situation. it can be all, it can be nothing, it can be nothing at all, but still: all at once, once and for all |
identity a sense of me to you i seem so differently | sometimes i think about some things where you might think thinking things like this - is not worth a thought | a night so quiet, that once you breathe it seems that you scream from the inside out. inside out, comes the heart out of your mouth. you forget to think before you speak and just do as your heart believes might be best, you'd put yourself to rest. / in the end it's all a test | the morning light a shiver inside "how could it might be?" i ask myself every night people are hurt how unfair this world so few want to share so few really care "how do they feel?" on behold to be free nothing else they might see for their future it should be the brightest the kindest the finest way to live day by day no more tears, no more fears just purest love and respect |
dear politicians, dear people, why are you still holdin on still going strong forward, reckless with intentions too bold too cold while we do need the warmth in our hearts for those who need a new start so nothing keeps us apart anymore | it was right to let you go so you could grow in a version you know that is more you more you, to be true that is what i know now because ever since i wonder how i was able to step away from your kiss one i knew i would miss knowing, i'm no more his affection there is other distraction granting him satisfaction so he wouldn't miss me i was right to let you go a fact we both know but i thought we would grow i am still the girl you missed the one you wished would be yours she still is, of course 'cause true love never dies at least from one sight of eyes | life acts in waves just as humans do as a symphony, in harmony inspired by the water itself it's us that create life out of it it's a fulfilment to understand that we can be guided and no one's divided by the sound of the ocean pure as devotion no matter how near or far life feels like waves just as humans do as a passion, in satisfaction good and bad might come and go like the sea moving high and low but whenever at it's lowest it will always come back stronger going forward trust my word us humans we are born for that it is living in our head the will to express what's truly in mind | believe it or not you're all that i got but as i am waiting for you to pick me up i know that it's true that that should be not the case |
when exploring new things gets tiring, we reach out to the persons and places we know - why? knowledge brings us safety and comfort due to reminding us of all the experiences we already treasure in ourselves, bringing us to the state of mind we are in now and to the fact, that we are able to go back at all to reflect mistakes and achievements. so starting from the beginning is not representing weakness, it's showing that we know how to become greater than the point we came from. / knowing the know-how | the sun is day by day rising and setting in colors beyond beliefs. the oceans are glistening, the land is glowing, the flowers are growing the life is standing still and forgets how to breathe while it's opening its eyes to discover the cruelty of humanity. full of lies and empty promises, printed money is ruling this world destroying the true colors of this multifaceted wonder called planet earth and mother nature. / balance like flamingos | are we more human or machine? do we start with humanity and end up with squeaky movements? in our youth, we are purely enjoying life - no wonder we often think back to these days and catch ourselves saying "oh just to be a child again for a day, or two". now, at some certain kind of age we feel stuck, because we actually are. our gear is rosted already, decisions are made with a permanent caution alarming us to not move too far away from the comfort zone we see ourselves safe in. but being stuck in a cage of life just because we painted it golden? tell me, what do you mean then when you say that you're "living your life"? / can your emotions be engineered? | if you ever felt wrong or outside your zone take a seat and make yourself feel at home / you are your own |
everything comes back in waves. it won't be colored as it was before, but it will shine bright in another light. / somewhere, some point | is it not that we are searching for inspirations on flat screens through artificial installations when we can easily pick up the incredible creations nature is offering us every second of the day? / creative lecture | self reflection is always connected to looking yourself deeply in the eyes, catching a glimpse of your soul and feeding your heartbeat with feelings that bring you closer to your goal. / i am, so i be | as i am sitting here, just in my room out of nothing, feeling so blue wondering what i should do with my life you say "i also have no clue" that's when i know that - no matter what i do, if i'm with you our life is going to be alright |
when your muse stops by and places a kiss on your cheek, so tender - but you still feel the heat rising, leaving rosy dapples by their feet that's when, the artist itself looks already like a masterpiece painted all over with both: joy and love, a heart passing ideas to it's mind above by instinct putting on the artists glove that's when, the artist starts to fall in love | isn't it crazy that when you look back now, some people might be not close to you anymore - even tho you thought: "no this special one, they will stay forever, we've been through everything". turns out, that only you of you two has been through everything they did to you and now they are simply done with it, just like a task they marked as checked on their to-do-list. and even if it sounds awful, remember that it's good. meeting you was some sort of their job
and if they did it right, they helped you grow - if they did a bad job: i am sorry for your pain, but keep in mind that they are done with it, so you can start to mark them as checked in your lifetime as well. / stepping on hurtful words from the past | the wind in my hair equals the many, many butterflies who are trying to express my pounding heart and my flutter that is clearly shown on my rosy cheeks, when i see you | soothe your own soul watching how free the clouds go by - their footprints change the colors in the sky, tell your worries they just have to fly high in the sky and your heart will let loose |
touching your own lips slightly with your fingers while thinking intensely about that one tricky question your heart can not answer; shaking your head: "no, not now", using your ring finger to apply your glistening lip balm with a little bit of pressure, blowing a kiss to your mirrored self, a deep breath and go. / get ready with me | when even the light
(that was constructed by human beings as an invention on an electrical base) runs down the hallways like thick fluid; distorting themselves to show that even them are not safe in their house anymore - we should realise that our house is also running a marathon already: a marathon against the time / stop the climate change | a soft touch of the wind smelling like a sweet mixture of cherry blossoms falling of the big tree at the end of the street and the freshly cut green grass in grandma's garden you're just passing by. pleasing your skin by planting many, many little kisses on it, the sun is lightly warming your cheeks. / another description of pastel colors | when you wake up in the morning, what do you expect from the day? and when you know this, do you try to fulfill your expectations throughout these twenty-four hours? are you more surprised that you were able to do it or that you raised your own bar too high? / start your day right |
do you know these moments, where you realise that you are so excited for something that is just about to happen, that you just feel nervous and somehow embarrassed at the same time - but you still know, that it's going to be something good, something with a positive effect think of a moment in which you realised that you are so excited for something that is just about to happen; you already feeling your blood rushing towards your cheeks making you look like you got kissed too much by the sun - just because you feel kinda nervous and somehow embarrassed at the same time, even tho you know the outcome will have a positive effect on you. | six past five, is this life? around my brain the headache ties lay on a bed full out of knives - this is how i feel at night at mornings, i feel like a freak is this really what a lady should keep? please: just give me another glass of sleep because this is what i need | give me a strawberry kiss with your sweetened lips colored even more red than before, now that we started, i only want more / a refreshing addiction | fleeing from a situation that is causing negativity in your mind is an instinct and totally understandable - i am allowing myself to claim that this is most of the times the right way to protect yourself; but on your way back home, your heart needs to settle down again, so your soul can take roots again and bloom next spring in the bright colors of your beautiful personality |
deep friendship is about sharing a bond where you not only share time, love and support in slices - remember that their anger is yours, their sadness is yours, their hurt is yours; but also keep in mind that their happiness is yours, their positivity is yours, their success is yours. do not let negativity like jealousy and egoism blind your hearts when it comes to building a bond as strong as the ones you already try to keep with yourself. sometimes you need the other half to get yours back together, piece by piece. / rely on me for trust in yourself | a theory: having a "blackout" describes the point of view from the very top of your own construction, you've build up for the last couple of minutes, hours, days, nights, weeks and months or years. it gives you a rush of adrenaline and no matter if you are afraid of heights or not - you just hope that you do not fall down there, past everything you've already been through; you've already lived that part of your life and living it again is not the destination you aimed for. but while being scared, you are already allowing yourself to be lulled into a false sense of security and when you realise this, you will fall way faster than a heart can beat. falling endlessly, passing by all those emotional adventures, seeing yourself laugh and cry in such a quick succession, it's becoming one undefined expression; your vision getting too blurry to identify situations, your voice getting so silent, it seems to be more muted than quiet; your senses so numb that everything gets dark - blacked out. { but hey? hey! breathe; just open your eyes, enjoy the current view and look: what you've accomplished so far, it's amazing! be proud of yourself, i will be for sure, promised. now, let's reach out for the sky again - come, you got this. } | how come that something that is in it's original state, something that is raw and yet unseen is always called "unexplored"? how come this word leaves a certain bitterness on your tongue, once you've said it out loud, for everyone to be heard? how come it's stuck in a negative field in your mind; just thinking about it, you sniff your nose, screw your face, like you've bitten in a freshly cut citrus lemon? how come that this is then supposed to make you smile in the end, make you laugh out of truth and let you feel a genuine happiness energising your body? how come that these emotions aren't already applied on the lovely adventure of exploring then? / a dream is always raw at first sight | my heart, sometimes, when i think of everything you had to take in in the past couple of years, i feel so sorry. i always wanted you to be filled with joy, enthusiasm and love, so you can spread it to everybody and everything that surrounds you. i never would have thought, that there are people in this world, that are so hurt themselves they can only project their negativity onto their next ones. i also have to admit that i thought, that you would be okay with this and instead of helping you to get out of these connections as soon as the danger was laying in front of us like an opened card, i only pushed you more into the situation. i thought we could help them flip their behaviours around and become generously happy again; i thought when we give love, love would be the outcome, because that should normally always be the case. but sadly - and i can say it now with a cleared view - there are some people, that are full of bitterness and hatred perspectives and they won't change with pureness and good energy. they will stay in their state of mind, no matter what; they will even dig their hole way deeper in the morass of darkness; they won't take your hand you are reaching them from above, they will not even look at it, because they are too busy with getting deeper and deeper into their sickness. but keep in mind, my caring heart: as you can see, they are below your feet and that's also speaking for their niveau compared to yours. enjoy your view from the top and look at the clouds go by - you will reach the sky. / it's not your fault. |
looking up in the sky, watching clouds go by, i almost gotta cry, asking myself why? us hurting this beautiful world, feeling like i've never been heard. / mama, you just give, wanting us to live i am so sorry, we need to hurry | an imperfection is like stumbling over a stone lying in your way of achieving better things - but remember: it's not slowing you down, it's reminding you to keep in mind where you came from; and that's where everybody starts. / the beauty of flaws | the wind comes by; brushing your arm slightly, taking the burden from your shoulders, erasing the worries from your heart, clearing up the struggles in your mind and placing a small smile on your beautiful face, that shines again after the chills that we're ranning down your spine are finally calming down again; you look up to the sky and feel the sun warming your cheeks when you hear the tiniest whisper of a goodbye, just for a second. did this really happen? (the warmth in your chest is spreading) / kissed by the muse signed w (the wind) | i am not only thankful for the good things in life, but also for the things i got taught out of toxic relationships from the past. it doesn't matter if it was a good friend, acquaintances or even "lovers" they all made me realise, what i deserve, they made me realise my worth and made me love the things on me, they hated. it might have taken too long for me to understand that, but in the end i can proudly say that they gave me a present filled with bad words, that i turned into voices of butterflies / a résumé of healing |